RBT (Random Breath Test)
by Squiggle.giggle
Summary: Drew is caught accidentally speeding on his way to work, it just his luck that he gets pulled over by his Police Officer husband. Rick takes the opportunity to have a little fun


Hey guys! This is probably the crackiest thing I have ever written, I hope it makes you smile

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Drew was currently rocking out to an old 'System of a Down' song, it had come on the radio as he was driving to work and he had forgotten just how much he loved the song. He drummed on the steering wheel with probably too much enthusiasm, played air guitar better than Jimi Hendrix and sung along at the top of his voice. While he was performing this solo concert in his 2019 black Jeep Compass Sports Edition, he didn't realize he had started driving faster than the speed limit. As the song was coming to a close he could hear the sound of those all too familiar sirens, as well as red and blue lights, flashing in his rearview mirror.

"Oh shit," Drew muttered as he pulled over on to the side of the road a few blocks from the hospital. He dug in his scrub pants trying to find his leather wallet so he could have his license ready for the officer. What seemed like an eternity later the police officer finally emerged from the squad car and strode to the driver's side window the doctor groaned in frustration when he recognized the man in uniform.

"Good evening sir, do you know why I pulled you over today?"

"Because you have nothing better to do?" Drew sassed, seeing the enormous grin spreading over his husband's elated face.

"Sir I'm going to ask you to speak with more respect," Rick informed, his smile betraying his professional demeanor. "Licence and registration?" Drew handed them over and held back a comment about how Rick knew the Jeep was registered, considering he was the one who had gone to DMV and completed the paperwork himself. The officer studied the license with intense scrutiny, having entirely too much fun with this traffic stop.

"Anthony Michael Alistair," Rick read.

"It's pronounced Andrew actually but I prefer Drew," Drew corrected, wondering why he was going along with this ridiculous charade.

"Drew, my apologies. License is still in date, you live in a nice street; it must be close to a good school district and your workplace. Probably harassed your partner about that I bet," Rick surmised, the doctor glared at the other man as remembered the drama of moving out of both their bachelor apartments and moving in together, the fights they had about where they should live and how much they should spend.

"Hmm it says here that your age is 37, you look much older," Rick teased, enjoying the outraged expression on the other man's face.

"Is this going to take much longer? I have to be at work in ten minutes, I haven't even been told why I was pulled over," Drew snapped, taking his licence and putting it back in his wallet as he ignored the stupid grin on his husband's face.

"You were going 35 in a 30 zone," Rick explained, his hand reaching for something on his Duty Belt, "you sound like you're slurring your words, have you had anything alcoholic to drink today? Or have you partaken in consuming any illegal substances?"

Drew just stared at the other man like he had grown a second head, of course, he hadn't; he was going to work. The only time he had gone to work with alcohol in his system was for that very brief period after Rick and he had taken a break after the amputation; Drew hit up any and every bar to try and dull the pain. Even then he had given himself IV saline and a 'Banana bag' to flush the toxins from his body.

"No," Drew replied, looking at the breathalyzer in his husband's hand.

"Please blow into this tube until I say stop," Rick explained, holding the machine closer to Drew's face.

"Are you sure there isn't something else you want me to blow?" Drew asked flirtatiously, two could play this game. The doctor could tell the other man was biting the inside of his cheek, trying to stop himself from laughing and keep up this ridiculous game.

"Please blow into the tube," Rick repeated watching the device for the reading as the doctor complied and no he didn't find it hot that Drew took the tube deeper in his mouth than necessary. The captain was unsurprised when the breathalyzer showed a negative reading but he pretended to study and scrutinise the machine for dramatic effect. Rick thought about asking his husband to do a swab test to check for any narcotics in his system but decided his husband had suffered enough. "Ok, so the result has come back as 0.00, which is a negative reading. I'll let you off with a warning but you need to stick to the speed limit, you might not be so lucky next time to have such an understanding police officer."

"Are you sure you don't want to frisk me, officer? I might be hiding something long, hard and dangerous… in my pants," Drew tried to say seductively before crumbling to a fit of giggles, Rick couldn't hold back either and dissolving into a hysterical mess. Once he calmed himself, the officer rested his crossed arms on the open window of the Jeep, sighed contently as he smiled at his husband.

"Not right now but I'll definitely take you up on that offer later," Rick flirted.

"Deal," Drew quickly agreed. The moment was disrupted as the couple noticed a pair of ambulance speed passed them heading in the direction of the hospital, Rick's shoulder radio crackled to life the same time as Drew's pager lit up with an incoming message. The officer quickly responded to the incoming call while Drew read the pager.

"I'll see you tonight," Drew said as he placed the device back on his waistband, Rick nodded then started walking back to his squad car. "Hey!" the officer had only taken a few steps before he turned around and leaned through the Jeep's window he pressed a passionate kiss to the other man's lips. The doctor placed a hand on the back of his husband's head and deepened the kiss, smiling when he heard a surprised gasp. As Drew broke away he rested their foreheads together and grinned at the other man, "I hope this isn't how all your other traffic stops end."

"Not all of them," Rick teased, rolling his eyes Drew pushed the other man back playfully and started the engine. "Go save lives."

"I'm sure work won't be that exciting, probably some college kid will have something shoved up their ass," Drew shuddered with a frown.

"Well you have plenty of experience with shoving things up my-"

"Oh my god, do not finish that sentence!" Drew scolded, much to the entertainment of the other man. With one last kiss, they said their goodbyes and went their separate ways, as the doctor continued his journey to work, his mind couldn't help but wonder; he wouldn't mind continuing this roleplay when he got home… Rick had always wanted to take his handcuffs home with him.

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So there it is!

I'm working on another story that envolves smut so wish me luck!


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